Markus Birdman posts us drugs

August 8, 2012

Stand-up comic Markus Birdman has come up with a unique way of promoting his 2012 Edinburgh Fringe show: sending journalists 'drugs'. It all makes sense though, as his show this year is based on the subjects of life and death, and he'd like people to stay alive to see it.

The package from Markus landed on the mat at BCG Towers the other day, containing the pictured items in it. There's a set of pills from 'The Stand Pharmacy' reportedly containing the active ingredient 'Markus Birdman'. The instructions point out the dose is '60 minutes' and should be dissolved with laughter. 'Take one every 24 hours at 9.20pm to prevent hardening of hearts. Side effects may include heightened mood, tingling sensations and elation'.

Then there's some wine - a well known cure for problems. This appears to be a Markus Birdman vintage, with the description on the back describing it as 'deep and dark in character, yet still bright and sparkling in tone, with just a hint of bitterness. Smoothly palatable with a beguiling depth and persistent finish, this vintage has elements of fruitiness with a suggestion of nuttiness. Ageing well, but still youthful, ready now as the perfect accompaniment to any evening.'

Just in case the above fail, there's also helpfully a mortuary toe tag to save the coroner time. Tick box options include the ability to indicate the funeral director involved: The Co-op, The Coalition, or Ingmar Bergman.

We've not yet been brave enough to try the pills, but a sniff suggests they may be formed of some minty ingredient.

Markus Birdman - Love, Life & Death is on throughout the festival at The Stand comedy club at 9:20pm. The show is about the subject of death - something Birdman has been contemplating recently as, at the age of 40, he's had a stroke. He explains: "I had a stroke. Nothing will make you assess your life more keenly than the prospect of you imminently losing it! Eight months of heart recordings, blood tests, brain scans, swallowing cameras, and being injected with yellow radioactive stuff will do that."

He adds: "Death is still a very taboo subject. We just don't want to talk about it. We all know it exists. We all realise that someday we'll have to go there, but we're certainly in no rush. It's like Disneyland in that respect, only with fewer balloons. Death, Hamlet said, is the "undiscovered country, from whose bourn no traveler returns". And that's what scares us. Because who knows what death actually is?"

It's probably worth emphasising Birdman's show isn't going to put you in a downer for the rest of the day. Whilst it is informed by death, the comedian is promising it'll be 'a joyous, witty and profound celebration of life'.